Friday, March 18, 2011

Mississippi visit, cypress trees, art, Indianapolis Zen Center

Been busy...went to Jackson, MS to visit some very special friends.  As usual had a meaningful and encouraging visit...kind of sad leaving; Jackson is like a second home to me.  One of my favorite places in MS is a small cypress swamp on the Natchez Trace about 45 min NE of Jackson.  For some unknown reason the swamp intrigues me...the cypress trunks are so soothing to look at, slow gradual curvature of the lower trunk...with dark openings on the bottom edges..and the cypress roots forming "knees" around the base of the tree; they are strangely shaped twisted knobs that are visible above the water....here are some pics i took..


not much greenery yet...in the summer its much more colorful.  yes i have seen snakes and alligators here.  i once watched an alligator for close to an hour float around and every once in a while catch something in the water and thrash it around and eat it.  it looked like it was 9 ft long but maybe my imagination exaggerated the length of it.  One of the best things about this place is that it is very quiet.  I love being places where i can hear no traffic, no planes, no factories, no engines, no trains.  Also, at night the stars are incredible.  i have always lived in urban areas until now, and light pollution really takes a lot away from the beauty of the night. 

One of my best friends is Paula, and I stayed at her house when i visited; as i always do when i'm in Jackson.  She is an incredible person and i cannot get over how much she has done for me over the years, especially during my roughest times.  Here is a pic of her 2 sons....they are growing so fast.  and they are adorable. 

also got some time to spend with my friend Patrick...here is some of his recent artwork...he is also an incredible person. 
yes, its a fake tatoo on his forehead.  he is standing in front of the mural he painted that is hanging in Northpark mall...it is way too big to fit in one pic...so here are some parts of it.....

and that's only a small portion of it.  the closer you get the more detail you see.

Also saw several other very good friends but didn't take their pictures...they would roll their eyes if i posted pics of them on a blog anyways.  :)  i try to visit mississippi every 4-5 months....its like a second home to me and i wish i could live there part of the year and here part of the year.

I finally finished a mosaic i have been working on for a long time.  i made a smaller one like it a couple years ago but i wanted to make a bigger one to hang in my living room.  The butterfly is called a red-spotted purple (for the red spots on its underside) and it is a very special symbol to me for reasons i won't go into.  but here's a pic....

like the other one, it is made out of old magazine ads glued underneath pieces of clear glass; laid on MDF and grouted with black grout.  There are pieces of stained glass spread throughout also.  The magazine pics are mostly trees, flowers, stars, fire, under water scenes, snow scenes, etc mostly from nature magazines. finished product is 2 ft x about 1 3/4 ft. 

Also, here are my most recent paintings,  self portrait



last weekend i went to Indianapolis for a Zen retreat.  There is an old house on the north east side of Indy that is Indianapolis Zen Center.  I went to it because i wanted some more pointers on meditation practices.  Zen is mostly associated with Buddhism, but you can practice Zen meditation if you are of any religion.  I don't find a lot of resources dealing with Christian meditation (but there are a few on the esoteric "Christian Zen", so this is a way i am trying to incorporated more mindfulness into Christianity.  i was very pleased with the workshop, it was exactly what i was looking for.  well, that concludes my posting for today....

Thursday, March 10, 2011

why depression hurts more in Springtime?

Yes, depression is dreadful; but without it, this poem would not have been written, and the beauty and comfort of finding compassion for another's pain would not exist if one does not experience his/her own pain. 


"I dreaded that first Robin, so,
But He is mastered, now,
I'm accustomed to Him grown,
He hurts a little, though --

I thought If I could only live
Till that first Shout got by --
Not all Pianos in the Woods
Had power to mangle me --

I dared not meet the Daffodils --
For fear their Yellow Gown
Would pierce me with a fashion
So foreign to my own --

I wished the Grass would hurry --
So -- when 'twas time to see --
He'd be too tall, the tallest one
Could stretch -- to look at me --

I could not bear the Bees should come,
I wished they'd stay away
In those dim countries where they go,
What word had they, for me?

They're here, though; not a creature failed --
No Blossom stayed away
In gentle deference to me --
The Queen of Calvary --

Each one salutes me, as he goes,
And I, my childish Plumes,
Lift, in bereaved acknowledgment
Of their unthinking Drums -- "

Emily Dickinson

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

"HIS silence is like water"

MY words sink like stones (without even a ripple!)
Ha! they will not be missed on-shore;
countless stones lie there, worthless stones lie there, passionless stones lie there
do any Precious stones lie there?

my words sink like stones (heavy stones without a ripple!)
Ha! they will not be remembered off-shore;
persuading stones lie there, beckoning stones lie there, seducing stones lie there
do any True stones lie there?

they lie: sparkling under water pleading possession
they dry: dulling under air abdicating allure

and my soul sinks without a ripple